Signs You're Wasting Your Time on Him ...
1. YOU HAVEN’T BEEN ASKED OUT ON A DATE YET
The biggest sign that you’re wasting your time on him is if you have not even been asked out on a date yet. If you just met the guy a few days ago, give it some #time, obviously. But if you’ve been messaging back and forth for a while now or maybe you have mutual friends with him and see him out and about, it should be a red flag that he hasn’t made a move to ask you out yet. Ladies don't waste your time for waiting for him to make ask you out on a date when you've been talking for more than 3 months. A sista should never wait for a man to ask for a date that long or even more.
2. YOU FIND OUT HE’S STILL HANGING WITH HIS EX
It’s healthy to be cordial with ex’s, but staying in touch with them, hanging out with them, buying presents for them, and spending important holidays with them…well, that’s another flag right there. The guy I was getting to know better did all the above, and worse, he posted pictures on social media NOT KNOWING that I knew that was his #ex. HUGE flag for me, huge. I still talk with guys I’ve dated before, but he took it to a whole other level. YIKES.
3. YOU DON’T FEEL WANTED BY HIM
Before finding out he was “catching up” with his #ex and “just hanging out”, I had already experienced signs of not feeling wanted by him. It seemed like every #time I expressed my quirky, bubbly, fun side (that I’m really proud of because it defines who I am) I just felt like he smiled and brushed it off, like he didn’t really care about me for me. BIG NO-NO, #girl…you deserve to feel wanted.
4. YOU FEEL LIKE YOU CAN’T BE YOURSELF AROUND HIM
Piggy-backing on the last point, I just felt like I couldn’t even be myself around him. My gut feeling was telling me not to open up to him, not to be myself around him, and not to let him in. It’s easy to fall in love with the idea of being with someone, which is why most women ignore these signs and keep pursuing their #crush. The less I felt like I could be myself around him, the more encouraged I was to leave him in the dust.
5. YOU QUESTION HIS EVERY MOVE
Jealousy is an ugly feeling, my dear, an ugly feeling. If there are surges of anger bottled up inside you because you feel that you can’t trust him or that you’re questioning his every move, stop wasting your time on that man, because your health and sanity is worth more than feeling stuck in a #relationship of questioning and doubt and insecurity. Your #man should make you feel loved and wanted and special and you should feel respect and trust towards him.
6. YOU REALLY DON’T KNOW MUCH ABOUT HIM
If your relationship with your crush is more physical than emotional or if it’s built more around you talking about yourself and him just sitting there listening but not ever contributing to the #relationship, it’s yet another red flag. Using my ridiculous experience as a testimony, I found myself talking a lot more about me than he was talking about himself. I felt like it was a one way street with him. So not worth my #time.
7. YOU DON’T FEEL LIKE A PRIORITY
Not every #relationship is perfect, I get that and I know that. But when you’re with someone who really cares about you and who really wants to get to know you better, he’s going to put a lot of effort in making sure that you’re feeling like a priority. Think about the one guy who you’re so not into (either because you think of him as a brother, or a creep) but who is completely infatuated with you. He tries hard to make you priority, doesn’t he? It might annoy you or push you further away from him, but he’s trying. Why should it be any different with the #guy who you like who actually likes you back? Think about it.
8. YOU ARE ALWAYS INITIATING THINGS
Hands down if you’re finding yourself being the one to ask him out on a date or asking him to meet you at the movies or asking him to be your gym partner, then he’s not worth your #time. Again, it goes back to what I said about a one-way street. You shouldn’t always be the one initiating #things.
9. YOU GET “MISS YOU” MESSAGES WITH ZERO ACTION
Actions speak louder than #words. We all know this. If you are feeling upset by the messages that go unnoticed or unanswered, stop wasting your time on him. Internalize that you are worth so much more than a #boy who is just dragging you around for his own entertainment. Last sappy part about my testimony is that I used to receive “miss you” messages all the time and days would go by without any follow up messages or “let’s hang out” messages.
Follow your gut. Ultimately that's what it comes down to. If after reading this article you feel angry or confused because you know, deep down, that you're not meant to be with the person that you're trying to get to know better, then take this as a sign. It's better to stop wasting #time on someone in the relationships' infancy stage rather than date, build up years together (which may end up being more miserable than happy) and then break things off. Be smart, follow your inner guide, and know that you're loved no matter what decision you make. What signs made you realize that you were done wasting your time on your #crush?
Perfect guide to get rid of the #trash in your love life. Love it. Reminds me of whatever I had going on with Alex.
ReplyDeleteyes, agree. trashing that got you what you truly desire and deserve. :) thank you for reading.
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